oh god the rape fog is back!
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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