Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
And then he peed in my hair
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