oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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