Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
