i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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