WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Randomize
