he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
my poor anus
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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