We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
