Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
