I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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