Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
