im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
