My underwear smells like fireworks.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
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