Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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