I looked at my own cervix.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
foreskin is a definite game changer
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
