My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
