I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Randomize
