four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
