its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
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