If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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