That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
