It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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