quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
