Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
