I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
try to milk me bitch
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