i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
