your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity�
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
