that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
