you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Randomize
