she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i hope kanye doesn't show up to patrick swayze's funeral. " i'll let you get back to your funeral in a minute...but michael jackson had the best death of the year. just sayinnn ".
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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