She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
