well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
