I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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