she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
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