When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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