There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
