I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
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