Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Randomize
