I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Randomize
