How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
