Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
