I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize
