no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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