this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i wish my penis had a tongue
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
