Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
