yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
