I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
