I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
