I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
