HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
So apparently I’m into choking now
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